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Why would someone say this...

669 Views 16 Replies 14 Participants Last post by  dinade
So I'm at a funeral yesterday. I'm like a celebrity
(yeah right) because i"m going to be on the local tv midday show and it's going around this funeral like wild fire. Anyway the wife of the poor man who passed is introducing me to everyone (she's so sweet) and telling about my cool cloth diapers (she did pins and pants when she did cloth) and this one lady says well I"m only glad I didnt have to use cloth on my 4 children. I was so dumbfounded I just walked away. What should I have done? It really is steaming me up right now. I need to let it go but I just can't believe the gall of some people. She's telling people about me and my diapers and someone says how blessed they are for not having to use them.
I mean how inappropriate can you get?

I've had kind of a sucky week because someone not paying attention caused me to hit them (by driving like an idiot across a parking lot and then now acting like he won't pay and it was so obviously his fault. He caused me to tbone his car in his driver and back seat door. Luckily we weren't going fast. After waiting for the police for an hour and they didn't come, I went home and now he says he's not paying. I can't sleep today because of all this crap that's running through my head.

and then 3 days later the news comes out to do a story on my diapers. I know it's great and I should just let hte other two things go. Breathe, breathe. LOL
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Geez, sorry to hear about your accident - hopefully there were witnesses??

About the diaper comment - just let it go
Life's too short to get worked up over miserable people.
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I didnt start CDing right away though i wouldnt have said thank goodness. I was a little disappointed. DH and I had discussed doing cloth before our son was born, but when I did some research on the net it totally fried my brain....couldnt compute all the direction and choices.

Im soo happy I decided to re think it later on!!!
maybe you should have replied "*Have* to? Everyone that's *anyone* cloth diapers today, dahling!" :LOL

No, really - I have gotten that kind of response before - the whole implication that only "poor people" use cloth, and only because they can't afford disposables. I usually just say "Oh, we don't have to - it's a choice I made for many reasons. Cloth is just better!"

Lately, I've been asking people if they like wearing disposable paper clothing. They usually look at me like I have 3 heads. Then I ask them why they think a baby would want to wear disposable paper undies.
I get the "have to" cd too. Its funny that people don't think its a choice but rather one they are forced into. I think most people are "forced" into using paper diapers because they don't know whats available in cloth. Could you imagine the looks if you said, "I am so glad I don't have to use paper diapers on my kids." LOL.

On the side, sorry about your accident. Thats awful.

Sorry about your accident. You should be able to file a claim with his insurance compnay.

As for the diaper comment. People are rude and inconsiderate.

I would have said "what do you mean by that?" and let her make an a$$ out of herself.
I did get a witness and went to the police station and filled out a report and filed it with his insurance co. So hopefully it will be taken care of out of his pocket.

You guys have the greatest remarks. I never think of things to say. I wish I'd have thought of the paper pants and that cloth is better and just flat put it back in her court with what do you mean. I mean for goodness sake we were all excited and then she said that.
I will let it go though and feel the cloth love~~

Thanks again ladies.
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Just wanted to offer a
, Dina.
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"Could you imagine the looks if you said, "I am so glad I don't have to use paper diapers on my kids." LOL."

I HAVE said this!!! Just today to the mom of the 16 mo. old I babysit. She had a blow out yesterday while still in her paper (I CD her at my house) and I complained to her daddy when he picked her up last night, but tonight when mom came, she apologised for the mess, and I said "I'm just glad I don't have to use paper dipes on Mandela".
I try to save the changing back into paper till they get to the house, so they are taking the cloth off (just a pf usually) and putting the paper back on. I like them to see what she's missing, but it doesn't seem to be working
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Good news on reporting the idiot driver (who no doubt wants to try to skip because of a very bad accident history), and hopefully worrying no more on that issue.

You should let the diaper comment go too, for your mental health, and because unfortunately, the world does have people in it who are thoughtless, rude, petty, and downright mean. It really doesn't have to do with diapers, it's basic manners. When someone is proudly discussing a new toy/job/house/etc, one does not walk into the conversation and belittle the thing in question. How difficult is that??? Huff. (emily post off)

The most wonderful comment I heard here (can't remember who from), one that doesn't openly confront someone about their underwear choice, :LOL was something like this:

"Cloth is a joy for me to use....after all, we could use paper plates and plastic utensils instead of dishes and silverware, but we don't, because it would be wasteful, expensive, and the real thing is just so much nicer."

Happy cloth thoughts!

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Something I've started doing in recent years, when dealing with idiots, is to put the ball back in their court. Make them explain their position - nine times out of ten, they can't. So I say something like, "What a remarkable thing to say! Tell me, why do you feel that way?" (It's the social worker in me coming out!). And then watch the squirm.

It really puts people on the spot, epecially if others are watching. Sometimes, the person will launch into a diatribe about their thoughts, but usually they get caught in their own trap
. And, at the very least, they don't have the last say: you can use whatever explanation you offer to bolster your own position.
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Awwww Dina - I'm sorry about the accident and the funeral
: Sounds like it's been a rough and stressful week - because I know that even though the TV thing was fun, it also had to be stressful as heck for you getting prepared for it.
But like someone said, just think - come Monday you will be on TV!!! YAYAYAYAY!!! Paper diapers sure as heck won't put you on TV!
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I am going to let it go. Stevie you have the best things to say! I guess I was just so stunned that I couldn't say anything! Next time I'll be more prepared. Thanks Kimberly and ladies. Thanks Mia it was fun and I will be glad to see it air. I'm glad this week is almost over!
Thanks for the hugs! You ladies really lifted my spirits.
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What she said was thoughtless BUT honest. She is thrilled not to have had to deal with the extra laundry, and can think of no reason why anyone would want to. The nonconfrontational comebacks you've had suggested here are perfect; they might make her realize there are good reasons for choosing cloth other than finances. How old she is may make a difference too- my mother has said that she didn't know anyone who wasn't thrilled when disposable diapers became commonly available in the 70s, when neither washing machines nor cloth diapers were any great shakes.
Sorry to hear about the rude comments and the accident

So how did the tv spot go????
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MiaPia was there and SpiralWoman and me and another friend. It'll air on Monday at 12:30 cst on cbs. (newschannel5 in my city it's not nationwide it's a local midday program). But it went great. She's giving me a 7 minute spot on a holiday!!!!! What wonderful free advertising!! YEAH me and YEAH cloth diapering!!
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