In quite a few states the only way you can stand a chance of getting soy milk is if you have a doctor's note stating that your child has a dairy allergy. Mere lactose intolerance, at least in AZ, will only get you a balance of more cheese/less milk and the option of getting lactaid/acidophilus milk.
I work for WIC in MD. WIC is a state run program, so what you can get varies from state to state. It's also all based on government contracts with the different food companies. The only states I know that will provide soymilk are North Carolina and Hawaii (though there may be more). In the other states, WIC doesn't have a contract with a soymilk company to provide it (probably because of the dairy companies' pressure to not).
If your child is milk allergic, WIC will probably give you a toddler soy formula. But it's kinda gross. Not exactly soymilk.
My older neice got Pediasure instead of milk (non-dairy, non-soy). It was a huge fuss, but eventually her doctor wrote a note saying that a) she was severly underweight (less than 1st percentile) and b) she was allergic to milk (which she was). The doctor suggested Pediasure as a supplement, and the WIC office obliged.
P.S.-If the concern is about sweeteners in soy milk, you could tell them that there are unsweetened varieties available.
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