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Wondering when I will end up in the other forum.

562 Views 5 Replies 5 Participants Last post by  taradt
I'm bleeding again right now. I don't know if you could even consider it spotting because it doesn't end up on the pad.

I'm so tired of this game. I always wonder where it will end. I have one son who is here with me and one who I couldn't hold onto who is buried in the cold dark ground in the cemetary.

So I guess I have a 50/50 chance.

I don't like those odds.

SO tired. So depressed.

I was wondering if other women in here had to end up giving up custody of any older children because of problem pregnancies. I am unable to chase after my toddler and no one is really here to help me. I wonder if he would be better off in state care.
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I wish I lived closer so I could lend a hand!! I know what you mean about 50/50 odds. I don't like them, either. I spotted in 2 pg's, 1 I m/c'd, the other is still with me (28 weeks and growing). So I guess I fit the stats. I have never heard of anyone losing custody due to your situation.
's mama. This is a good place to vent and maybe some other wise mamas will be able to offer you some words of wisdom.

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i am sorry you are going through this. have you seen your care-provider yet?
it is so draining, wanting something so badly, especially after you have lost before...

i would be so shocked if your fear of having your child taken from you because you are going through a hard time could come to be. there are many things that could happen long before that extreme. can you ask for help from 1)family 2)friends 3)organizations like a church or hospital or childcare service that may be willing to help if you need it? i am so sorry you are feeling so unsupported. sometimes it helps just to put words to those fears to give them a different perspective, to take the fear's power away, you know? i hope you are hanging in there, at least for today... one day at a time...
It's not really about the state "taking" him as much as me giving him to them because I don't have any support. My mother works. My Dad isn't in the right mental state to take care of my boy. I have no relatives who do not work except for my ancient grandparents who are frail and I don't think could handle my boy.
I feel somewhat like I'm being forced to choose between the unborn child and the son who is here with me.
I'm sorry you are in such a bad place, mama. Don't give up hope with this baby. Many women spot through the early months of their pg, and the fact that it's not enough to get on a pad is good. I didn't notice if you said how far along you are. You said you are tired and depressed. I did notice in your sig that you are married. Is your husband able to help at all with your toddler? Is he aware of how depressed you are feeling? I can't imagine even thinking of giving up custody of my child bc of being pg w/ another. Do you have a midwife or dr with whom you could discuss how badly you are feeling? They could help you, maybe with herbs or possibly medication. I don't know, I am not a dr, and I may be way out of line. But you sound seriously down, and I am just trying to think of things that could help. Blessings to you, mama.

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Your son will be fine even if you can't run around with him for awhile, you can read, snuggle even (gasp) watch tv together. You need to give yourself a break, you are doing the best you can in a very hard and uncertain situation. Spotting isn't necessary bad but I know after a loss it can be very scary. Call your midwife and take it easy for a few days.

please be gentle on yourself mama

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