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<p>I am just reaching a point where I don't know what to do with her. She is a wonderful, sociable, cute little kid and I don't want to be medicating her but her issues are getting worse and worse.</p>
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<p>Physically she still suffers a lot of the same, joint pain, food issues, diarhoea (she takes mebeverine for this now), fatigue etc but its her mental issues that are becoming increasingly worrying.</p>
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<p>I spoke to an educational psychologist at her school about and he said he had never come across a 4 year old (she was 4 then, 5 today) who had such anxiety it affected her sleep and it does affect her sleep. She can just lie there crying and she doesn't know what she is scared about, all she knows is that she is scared.</p>
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<p>She wakes up with awful nightmares that get her crying (like, I leave her to die in a volcano and she gets burnt alive or she loses us and can't find us or she gets eaten, just REALLY nast nightmares).</p>
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<p>I thought she had settled in at school, it appeared to be the one place she felt safe, but no, this morning I couldn't leave her there because she was too uset (she was having a lot of knee pain as well), essentially, she was scared that DH and I would die while she was at school, and then we would be buried and turned into ghosts and she has never seen a ghost before and she is scared of them. She was so scared she was just crying her eyes out.</p>
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<p>She keeps finding diffent reasons for her fear, she is scared of the toys watching her, she is scared of the teachers, she is scared of the other children, she is scared of not being with us, she scared of eating at school, essentially, she is just scared, she is even getting scared of the ways we walk to school.</p>
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<p>her fear/anxiety is disrupting her life pretty  much completely now, it affects her sleep, her diet, school life etc and I just don't know what I can do.</p>
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<p>I am desperately trying to get in contact with the educational psychologist again, she has a paediatrician appointment at the begining of January (mainly for her pain issues but obviously this will have to be brought up as well) and I am also waiting for our health visitor to sort out some other sort of psych thing attached to the school that may help.</p>
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<p>She is 5 years old and I am considering putting her on medication because of this and  feel awful about it but at the same time I am heartbroken by the fear she finds in every aspect of life. Its devastating for both DH and I to see her like this and I just want it to stop but I don't know how, we have tried lots of calming music, DVDs, books, talking to her about her fear, trying to teach her meditation and 'emptying her mind' but nothing works.</p>
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<p>The only thing I can think of that might be causing this is that in the EDS 3 thing we have, apparently anxiety issues are more likely due to a doubling of the anxiety gene or somethig (I have suffered my whole life with odd fears and anxiety state as well).</p>
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<p>Most of the time I make her go to school, but today I let her off and actually, I am thinking about keeping her off until Monday next week because I want to have some proper talking with her to see if I can find out what is really going on and see if I can make her feel more relaxed and happy about going, just not sure what to say to make her better.</p>
 

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<p>:hug  sounds like you have done so much to help her.  I am struggling with similar issues w/ my 7 yo and have been trying to do everything to avoid drugs, but I have come to a point where I feel it is necessary for his own wellbeing and that of our entire family.  I don't think you are out of line for considering it, as long as you're doing everything else to help her.  Perhaps it will only be for a period of time until she matures and is more able to develop coping strategies for her fears and she can wean off of it.  I'd like to hear what others think, since I haven't experienced it yet and am only hoping it will make a difference for my son.</p>
 

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<p>If the anxiety was severe and debilitating, and if everything non-pharmaceutical we'd tried didn't work, then yes. It sounds to me from what you described that right now her anxiety is so high  that she's not in a position to be learning the skills that could help alleviate her anxiety. If she's in constant fight-flight mode, she won't be learning. Not social skills, not self-care skills for mental health and maybe not even academic skills. If you choose medication, and it's appropriate, I'd definitely want it very very closely monitored.</p>
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<p>There's also a strong relationship between pain and anxiety in my family. Honestly, I don't know which one 'comes first'. Pain, or the fear of pain, brings my sister intense anxiety. The anxiety then brings somaticisation, which increases the pain, and it's a vicious cycle.</p>
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<p>If it helps, a friend of mine has a son with some pretty severe issues. At the start of their journey, they declared "no meds". Two years later, he was on Risperdal because they had exhausted all other options and <em>he</em> was suffering.  He was on it for 18 months or so-- and that 18 months made a huge difference for him in terms of his ability to learn to skills he needed to cope. Without the meds, he wasn't able to develop any skills to deal with his issues. On meds, he learned the skills well enough to be able to come off the meds and function fine. (He still has his ups and downs, but there are more ups than downs these days, and he's doing really well.)</p>
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<p>P.S. there's a thread over in the Special needs board that you might want to check out: Support for Mamas of Kids with Anxiety: <a href="http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1274789/support-thread-for-mamas-of-kids-with-anxiety/20">http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1274789/support-thread-for-mamas-of-kids-with-anxiety/20</a></p>
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<br><br><div class="quote-container"><span>Quote:</span>
<div class="quote-block">Originally Posted by <strong>LynnS6</strong> <a href="/community/forum/thread/1281645/would-you-let-your-5-year-old-take-anti-anxiety-medication#post_16072058"><img alt="View Post" class="inlineimg" src="/community/img/forum/go_quote.gif" style="border:0px solid;"></a><br>
If it helps, a friend of mine has a son with some pretty severe issues. At the start of their journey, they declared "no meds". Two years later, he was on Risperdal because they had exhausted all other options and <em>he</em> was suffering.  He was on it for 18 months or so-- and that 18 months made a huge difference for him in terms of his ability to learn to skills he needed to cope. Without the meds, he wasn't able to develop any skills to deal with his issues. On meds, he learned the skills well enough to be able to come off the meds and function fine. (He still has his ups and downs, but there are more ups than downs these days, and he's doing really well.)
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<p>P.S. there's a thread over in the Special needs board that you might want to check out: Support for Mamas of Kids with Anxiety: <a href="http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1274789/support-thread-for-mamas-of-kids-with-anxiety/20">http://www.mothering.com/community/forum/thread/1274789/support-thread-for-mamas-of-kids-with-anxiety/20</a></p>
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<p>Thank you, that makes a lot of sense, and gives me some hope.  I will check out that SN thread as well.<br>
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