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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I have been wanting to get on the computer for a while now and look to all you mammas for support! This may get long.<br><br>
DD is 23 months. Generally, she is very sweet and happy (with the usual exceptions) Three weeks ago, we began the process of moving out-of-state. We arrived at our new home two weeks ago. As of today, I can say that most everything is arranged and in place. The areas of the house that most directly affect her were in place a week and a half ago. Our new place (still an apt) I think is wonderful for her. The grounds are awesome...we can go for lovely walks, feed the ducks, look at the birds, frogs, go swimming, play at the playground...definitly an improvement.<br><br>
Here is the deal. Now, my sense is that her recent behavior can be caused by a number of things, namely:<br>
1. The move...the stress<br>
2. Four canines making their way to the surface (one finally surfaced, the others just days away)<br>
3. Her age...just a phase?<br><br>
In the past few weeks, she has become:<br>
1. More aggressive than before. (If I do something she doesn't like she'll give me a bad look and run over and hit me and say no)<br>
2. Screams loudly and is demanding. (Yells for almost everything. I try and remind her to use a quite voice or ask using please or just say "you don't have to yell, just say, 'mama, water please')<br>
3. Throws tantrums. (yesterday at home depot I took her off a ladder she wanted to play with after she demanded to "walk" instead of let me hold her. She cried and screamed and I could not calm her. I finally just decided to leave. Today at the pool, she couldn't decide what she wanted. She is new to swimming and wanted me close but then wanted to be on her own. She wanted to be out and then wanted to go back in. I decided it was time to leave after telling her we would be leaving soon, because she was yelliing and screaming in her indecision. She screamed the whole walk home, I felt so bad for her. When we got home I gave her binky and she fell asleep in my arms. A little early for nap.)<br>
4. Wants binky all the time! Not just one in mouth, one in hand as well. Previously, binky was only for sleep. Not any more.<br><br>
There is probably more, but you get my drift. Mainly, I am just worried about her. I know the past few weeks have been really hard on her. I have just been so consumed by this move. I have tried to take some time out just to focus on her, but maybe not enough. Is this just a phase? What can I do to calm her? I sometimes get afraid that she is going to become very aggressive, but maybe this is just normal toddler behavior? She still has very happy times, but just seems so moody. She is totally dramatic.<br><br>
Thank you for your help.<br><br>
--Jennifer
 

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Wow you have alot on your plate. Moving with a toddler that age is tough, we moved twice this year and our dd is 2 and a half.<br><br>
A couple of things about her age....regardless of your circumstances a child will typically begin to nurse a lot around 24 months. It is a developmental milestone and many steps are being taken in the independance department. Thus the nursing is a safe place.<br><br>
Eye teeth are a bugger forsure! <img alt="" class="inlineimg" src="http://www.mothering.com/discussions/images/smilies/hug.gif" style="border:0px solid;" title="hug">s to you and her.<br><br>
Yelling and aggression I view as ways of trying to make herself feel more in control. Ask her what she needs and what is missing. She may not be able to understand you but you will begin the road of effective communication.<br><br>
I am sorry this is short but I am pooped. Everything she is doing is typical I think. Drama seems to be the theme at this stage!<br><br>
Ask her to take a deep breath, calm down and use kind words. If this doesn't work I sometimes resort to saying....I cannot hear you when you talk like that please take a deep breath...etc.<br><br>
Hope this helps mama....Your new place sounds lovely! GOOD LUCK and happy housewarming
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
Mountain mom,<br><br>
Thank you for your kind and reassuring words. It sounds like you've been in this spot, 2 times this year? Wow. That is a lot of work.<br><br>
I really like your advice about fostering effective communication. I've been doing a little of what you said, but you've taken it even further...great advice.<br><br>
Thanks again!<br><br>
--Jen
 

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We took 4 trips since Mid March. Dd had a great time on all of them and adjusted pretty well on returning home. Though after the second trip she announced, "I don't want to go to any more places and stay home a long time ago."<br><br>
The third trip was to LLL, and the fourth, to New Orleans. She loved New Orleans, but it was so noisly and otherwise stimulating, it seemed to put her over the edge in terms of her travel tolerance. She had a great time, but coming home she's been much more agressive, dramatic, demanding, and wanting to be in the sling (hard at her size, but an old comfort measure). Disrupted naps and sleep. Bedwetting.<br><br>
Things were getting better, and then my IL's had a crisis at their house and came to stay near us awhile. Again, more fun for Dd, but also stimulating and a change in her routine. So much of my progress getting things back to normal has backslid.<br><br>
When Dd is really feeling hard to take (when I wake up in the middle of the night with her lying on me, wet), I remind myself she's been through a lot, and not to judge her based on this recent behavior, just give her lots of comfort, normal limits, and tincture of time. And lots of chances to sleep, really adhering to prompt naptimes and bedtimes.<br><br>
Even though something is better, or pleasant, or fun, is's a CHANGE, and requres adjustment. I imagine a move, even to a better place, could be disruptive for quite awhile.
 
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