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You know you're well into third trimester when...

3502 Views 95 Replies 45 Participants Last post by  COgirl19
- You wake up thinking that your hips have to be dislocated, they hurt so badly.

- Your last meal sits just below your clavicle burning a hole in your esophagus for about 20 minutes, and then you're hungry again.

- All you want to read are cooking magazines, but you are too stuck on the couch to cook.

- You have a 20-pillow sleeping system, but you still want to buy that magical circle pillow that wraps all the way around you.

- You make DH rearrange boxes in the attic for the third time because its just driving you crazy knowing things aren't in order up there.

Fill in the blank mamas!
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WOW those are hilarious! You wake up to pee at 4AM and then drink a 20oz. bottle of water before laying back down.
You know you're in third trimester when every movement you make is accompanied by a grunt or a sigh!
You yell to your 3 year old "OMG For the love of all things Holy, do NOT jump off the back of the loveseat!!! It'll take me twelve minutes to get to you if you break your arm!" and you're only on the regular couch. Or is that just me?
You hold the small of your back when walking or standing.

You are unable to bend at the middle.

You spend hours trying to guess what position the baby is in and why that position is causing utter agony.
When walking up the stairs leaves you winded

When you come up with lots of lists of things that have to be done before the birth

When you just don't care anymore about offensive pregnancy comments

When all of those painful and weird pregnancy symptoms you thought would never happen to you suddenly do
You suddenly have to pee so badly you can't move. And then you suddenly don't. All the while you are hoping you don't have the sneeze or anything....
Quote:

Originally Posted by bclare View Post
You suddenly have to pee so badly you can't move. And then you suddenly don't. All the while you are hoping you don't have the sneeze or anything....
Yeah. Cloth pantyliners (because they hold more and save you like 5 million dollars throughout a pregnancy LOL) are The Awesome.
I've got another one...
When you look at your hospital's website (or birth center... or birth supply list if you're a HB maybe? haha) just to see the maternity section even though you've already delivered there twice. I'm such a loser
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When you've given up on shaving anything lower than your armpits.
when you have so many things that need to be done but no energy or desire to actually get up and get them done.

when you drop something and your co-workers all stop to watch you pick it up ( I have started kicking things into another room before picking the item up)

people start 'moo'ing and 'quack'ing at you

you change your pants just to sit on the floor with the kids and then wonder how in the world you will ever get back up
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Quote:

Originally Posted by sew_crafty_girl View Post
When you've given up on shaving anything lower than your armpits.
ROFL!!! I was lurking but this made me spray tea I laughed so hard! (I suppose I can relate even though I'm still a month from the third trimester)

My kids make beeep beeeep noises like I'm a big truck backing up when I move around.


You girls are hilarious
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When you have to ask your six year old to help you up from the couch (and she just rolled her eyes at me like "Yeah right."

LMAO over the shaving. I finally did my legs a coupe of days ago because it was driving me nuts. I almost died.:p
When your 4 year old has started calling you 'very pregnant mama' instead of just mama.

When your dh wants to help you, ahem, relax and you tell him if he goes near that part of your body you will kill him.

Your chiropractor tells. You you've popped....for the 5th consecutive visit. @@

You get excited when you have to put your preschoolers in time out by sitting her on a bench at the mall...because you get to sit and rest too!
When you have to wrap your hands around your belly and pull up to stop the burning pain that is your lower abdominal muscles being permanently disfigured.

When you dream of creating a pulley system designed just for rolling you over at night
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Quote:

Originally Posted by sew_crafty_girl View Post
When you've given up on shaving anything lower than your armpits.
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DDC crashing - these are just way too funny!! I'm well in to my 3rd - at 36 weeks.

When your 4yo's friends make comments that you've got a fat belly and a big butt.


When you think that going to bed at night is going to magically make all of the swelling in your ankles disappear only to find them looking pretty close to the same as the night before!


When it litearlly takes you 10 minutes to get up from the floor after playing with your LO and it also involves a lot of rocking back and forth on all fours to get the juices flowing again!
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When the floor of your office / kitchen / house has lots of little things all over it you dropped and didn't have the desire to pick up. My DH kept asking why there were pieces of food all over the place or whatever else...my hands are very numb so I am clumsy. I just think at some point I will crawl around and pick it all up but I never seem to get there before he does ;-)
Oh, and about shaving.

We are going to Jamaica in a week and I think DH is going to have to do a bit of a trim down there since I can't see if but I know there is some serious fur going on....I don't want to scare people!
Quote:

Originally Posted by bclare View Post
Oh, and about shaving.

We are going to Jamaica in a week and I think DH is going to have to do a bit of a trim down there since I can't see if but I know there is some serious fur going on....I don't want to scare people!
DH did this for me a couple weeks ago. It was quite funny.
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