Mothering Forum banner
1 - 20 of 31 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
147 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
We had our first appointment with our midwife last weekend. It was great, but dh and I were shocked when she said that she expects me to gain 40 lbs!

From what I've read, 25-35lbs seems to be sufficient. One book says that people who gain 35-40lb+ tend to have harder times breast feeding.

My mom gained 35 lbs with me and it was her hardest birth. She gained about 20 with each of my brothers and the births were not hard. My mil said she only gained 16 lbs with my husband and he was just barely under 9 pounds. From what I've read, how much you gain and how much the baby weighs does not necessarily correlate.

Anyways.... I don't really think that I can gain 40 lbs. I've never been overweight in my life and I'm also vegan so I don't eat a lot of fatty stuff. I am making sure that I get enough protein etc, and so I am not concerned about gaining 40 lbs.. that just seems like way too much to me.

Any opinions/experiences with this? On our next appointment, I am going to talk to our mw more about this. I do not want to feel pressured to gain 40 lbs, when 25 could be sufficient


It's not really about "oh no I don't want to gain a lot of weight", I just really do not think that I could put on 40 lbs with the way I eat/exercise and I don't see why I need to... Especially since books that I've read said that someone who gains 25lbs could very well have an 8lb baby... Our mw was talking about "extra weight" or "reserves" for breastfeeding. Why do you need those? Doesn't breastfeeding relate to what you are eating and how many calories you are getting?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
3,846 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by heabrook
One book says that people who gain 35-40lb+ tend to have harder times breast feeding.
From what I've read, how much you gain and how much the baby weighs does not necessarily correlate.

Any opinions/experiences with this? On our next appointment, I am going to talk to our mw more about this. I do not want to feel pressured to gain 40 lbs, when 25 could be sufficient


Our mw was talking about "extra weight" or "reserves" for breastfeeding. Why do you need those? Doesn't breastfeeding relate to what you are eating and how many calories you are getting?
I gained about 37 pounds with my son & didn't have problems breastfeeding. I don't know if I would take that book seriously. I have served many clients that gained WAY more than 35 lbs & they all did fine with breastfeeding.

Don't feel pressured to gain 40 lbs. I am sure your m/w was just saying that may be her ceiling for weight gain for your body type/frame.

Yes, your body does normally have a small reserve for breastfeeding, but it doesn't really relate to the amount of calories you take in. Most women find that they lose more weight while breastfeeding since your body is in constant production mode.

If this is upsetting you, I would definitely speak with your m/w at your next appointment. I am sure that wasn't her intention though
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,318 Posts
Everyone is so different. I know women who lose weight throughout their pregnancy. 40 lbs seems a bit excessive to me but again some people need that weight. I would say don't set limits or weight goals and let your body handle it.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,928 Posts
I gained at least 45 pounds with DS and I had NO trouble breastfeeding!!! (Aside from a minor latch problem in the beginning that was fixed within the first week.)

I think everyone will gain what they are supposed to. So far I haven't gained anything, but did not lose all my baby weight from DS, and even if I had, I'd still be overweight anyway. My appetite just isn't as ravenous as it was with DS. I think I am eating better now, but this pregnancy has been so different from the first one, that I am not sure what to expect!

I think if you are eating good food, and eating when you are hungry, and not overeating/overdoing sweets, etc. you will gain what is right for you.

My son was 9 lb 8 oz by the way! And I'd retained a lot of fluid too, had high blood pressure.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
147 Posts
Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Quote:

Originally Posted by Gray's Mommy
I gained about 37 pounds with my son & didn't have problems breastfeeding. I don't know if I would take that book seriously. I have served many clients that gained WAY more than 35 lbs & they all did fine with breastfeeding.

Don't feel pressured to gain 40 lbs. I am sure your m/w was just saying that may be her ceiling for weight gain for your body type/frame.

Yes, your body does normally have a small reserve for breastfeeding, but it doesn't really relate to the amount of calories you take in. Most women find that they lose more weight while breastfeeding since your body is in constant production mode.

If this is upsetting you, I would definitely speak with your m/w at your next appointment. I am sure that wasn't her intention though

Well the book didn't say everyone who gains more than 35lbs of course, but it said that research had shown that women who gain more than the recommended 25 to 35 lbs during pregnancy were nearly 75% more likely to have problems breastfeeding.

And the recommendation didn't actually have anything to do with my body type/frame... she said that 40lbs was universal for everyone. I am 5'1" and started out at 91lbs pre-preg..... so 40 lbs sounds like a lot to me!

But I think that as long as you are eating healthy, your body will gain what it needs to gain.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,307 Posts
I gained 40 with my 1st and 35 with my 2nd. Nursed both of them, no complications.

It's several years later now, I'm hope I don't tip the scale at more than 40 this time. Whatever it takes to grow this beautiful baby.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,661 Posts
Quote:

Originally Posted by heabrook
But I think that as long as you are eating healthy, your body will gain what it needs to gain.
And that's all you need to remember


I gained the exact same with each pg, and am on track to do the same this go around. Eating habits have been different each time. Healthy, but different.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
832 Posts
I gained 30 with my son, and I am according to their silly charts "underweight." I don't believe in them telling me how much to gain. I eat when I am hungry, I stop when I am not. I eat healthy, sometimes I deviate to the yummy unhealthy stuff, but mostly I listen to my body. My body knows how much I need to gain with this baby.... so when you're hungry, eat. But don't just eat to gain weight because your doctor tells you to. My friend who is also "underweight" was told to gain 50 pounds, so she was eating all kinds of extra stuff, and she's on track to gain the 50 pounds and now they're telling her she's put on so much weight they might have to c-section.
:
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
754 Posts
Boy oh boy. You know, I'm just going by the gazillion times I've read 20-25 is a healthy amount, but that sounds so weird that she would say that. I'll ask my midwife tomorrow morning when I see her (of I can remember with this brain)

I guess what really strikes me is how different we all are. You know, I've read the August and September DDC's and women are all over the place with their weight gain. I just think that 40 is fine if that's what your body does, but that there's simply no reason to push it unnecessarily.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
2,029 Posts
I gained about 50lbs with dd, but I also had pre-e so I was pretty swollen. My dd was only 7lbs 2oz. When I started out I was about 190lbs not 91lbs though! Before this pg started I was at 155lbs and completely expect to gain about 40lbs. I never had one problem with early breastfeeding (only the toddler part) and I have never heard anything like that before. I wouldn't believe everything you read, not without doing some more research.

A lot of the fats from breastmilk actually come from the fat stores in your thigh and butt areas. So, it is a good thing to get some extra junk in your trunk while pg
. I lost my pg wieght fast and then a whole lot more and now I literally have no butt, its gone. It used to be perfect and now it's just flat. If you don't have any fat stores when the baby comes you may need to take on as much 1000 calories a day to keep from losing wieght.

Weither you gain 25lbs or 40lbs it will be as much wieght as your body needs. Eat healthy and keep your protien and good fats up and don't worry about the judgement of others.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,442 Posts
My MW told me she expects me to gain about 25lbs and I weight 110lbs right now and am 5'5'' and very active and healthy (I work at a gym teaching aerobics). I can see if you were severely underweight for her to recommend 40lbs, but it seems a bit excessive to me- especially considering your baby isn't going to be more than 10lbs. I would check on that...
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
147 Posts
Discussion Starter · #13 ·
I am not underweight. Well, those bmi charts and etc say that I am but I do not believe in those. I have always been very comfortable with my weight because I am short and also have a very petite frame. I think it will be fine, but I do feel like I need to talk to her about it so that she understands that I am not going to stuff myself to gain 40 lbs. As long as I am eating healthy and gaining weight, then there shouldn't be a problem.

I guess I am worried that she may be very forceful about the 40lbs and then it become an issue. I don't want to have conflict.

Jude -- if you could remember to ask your mw, that would be great! Every mw that we interviewed said the same thing actually (40 lbs is standard now is what they said) so maybe it is something that they are taught while training to be a mw here.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
586 Posts
i am underweight so they want me to gain 30-40lbs. i didn't think i could do it last pregnancy considering my mom only gained 10 with singltons and 15 with twins. but i was sadly mistaken. though most was caused from being so darn swallon. i gained exactly 40lbs. then had jayde and it was all off by the time i was 8 weeks pp. lucky me. so it is possible but 25lbs isn't going to hurt you. i know 40 was more depressing then anything. dd was still small considering my weight gain. 6lbs 1oz. so i don't know why they want some people to gain so much.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
175 Posts
I gained 90+ lbs with my daughter (I say + b/c I stopped looking in the last month). Not that this means anything, but just so you know, I never had any problems breastfeeding (other than the fact that I hate it -- did I just say that out loud?). I continued breastfeeding my daughter through my pg with my son and now I'm breastfeeding my son through this. No problems.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
975 Posts
well are you underweight?

I am UP this preg. but last time the useless twat of a dr I had at feast said I was "terribly" underweight (at 5'3" and 100 lbs, I was NOT either) she told me to gain 15 + 30 so 45 altogether.

I ignored all that and ate naturally and.....actually gained 65


almost all in the 3rd trimester.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
198 Posts
In real life, I don't know anyone who's gained less than 40 lbs!


I did the Brewer diet, and I gained about 45 lbs. I had no problem breastfeeding and lost the weight without trying.

I worried about it a lot last time, but I'm not going to let myself get worked up about it this time!
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
235 Posts
I gained 50 with my son and about 45 with my daughter. Both started nursing without a single issue. I lost all of my weight plus some by a year with both. I think that my body saves up extra fat for nursing and then I drop gradually back to my ideal weight without any effort.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,384 Posts
I think if you are eating well, getting enough exercise and generally taking care of yourself than you will gain the appropriate amount of weight that you need to gain - no matter how much it is. I have never really believed in weight guidelines so much as taking care of your body.

For myself personally, before my first pregnancy I was really underweight. I was almost 5'3" and weighed about 95 lbs. I gained 60 lbs with the pregnancy! I was huge and he only weighed a little over 6 lbs. But 3 months post partum, without doing anything special, I was down to 115 which was a much more healthier weight for me - and of course I also had bigger breasts, hips, etc.. LOL Let me just say I was much more shaplier and VERY happy with that weight LOL

I did a LOT of fertility hormones to have my second and put on a TON of weight from them. I was actually shocked by how much since I didn't own a scale. When I got pregnant with Sima I weighed almost what I weighed when I gave birth to Josh! But I ate well and took care of myself, and without trying I only gained about 18 lbs I think. Within a few months of birth I was 10 lbs less than my pre-preg weight. I got pregnant with Abigail when Sima was only 8 months, gained 22 lbs that pregnancy. Both girls had problems with bf'ing by the way, although they were caused by physical encumberances - I had a flat nipple for Sima and then Abby was born with a mild tongue tie, but she couldn't latch on.

Anyway, that is just my experience.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
4,539 Posts
I was slightly overweight with DD, and as a result my body used up what it needed before packing on the pounds. I had only gained 11 pounds by the time I delivered at 30wks, and she came out almost a pound heavier than the "average" for her gestational age. This time I've gained 2 pounds in the first 12wks, but I also started about 10lbs lighter than with DD.

Just stay healthy. My midwife has never been concerned with weight gain, as long as baby is growing well and you're doing fine.

Don't worry, mama. Your body will do what it needs to in order for you to have the baby you were meant to.
 
1 - 20 of 31 Posts
This is an older thread, you may not receive a response, and could be reviving an old thread. Please consider creating a new thread.
Top