[contactmaya]

Quote:

Originally Posted by richella

I think it was around 4-5 when we started telling the dds to wear clothes in public. In the house, they run around naked more or less freely (we don't like bare bottoms on the furniture, but otherwise we don't shame or make a big deal if they are naked). When they asked why, I'd say something like, "It's a social convention. In our culture, that's how people think people should dress, and I don't care enough about it to fight it." (They KNOW there are other issues that I care about a lot more, and am very willing to buck the trend.) That really is the long and short of it.

Thats really a question of hygeine more than social convention. Pinworms get spread that way.

 

[richella]

What I was saying was that we don't allow bare bottoms on the furniture. Other nudity we don't really care about, in the house.

 

[tittipeitto]

Haha! I also have two boys, one learned quickly without me telling him what the convention here in america is, and while he would spend his summers naked in my country, he would be embarrassed in boxers in front of his friends here. My younger one is not getting the modesty, at least not yet... I'm also not going to tell him this long story about sick people who might look etc... I don't want my kids being self concious about that, I'm there to keep them safe from the sick people I hope. So I guess I "LIE" and tell him that just put your pants on because in america you have to. And I'm not lying that much anyways. (and he knows some friends houses are exceptions) I used to say, "when we go outside we put on shorts", at some point there came the "why", so I had to blame someone, sorry america.

If I had a daughter and if I felt like I need to keep her covered, I would not go into the sexual predator issue, especially if you are always with her. I would also vote for the white lie, "to protect skin" or the bossy mom "because I say so" because it's totally ok to lie, to your kids if the truth is too much information for her age, and totally ok, if some rules in the house are just cause mom says so. I don't know how on earth respecting your mom and taking her word for it sometimes without explanation would be damaging to her or make her an easier victim (seems a little intense) if the home environment is open to conversation in most cases... I mean if you have sex with our husbad and your kid wants to come in and demends an answer why she can't, which one is better, to say just cause we say so, or to explain that seeing what private things your parents are doing right now would be damaging to you...?

 

[contactmaya]

Quote:

Originally Posted by tittipeitto
I mean if you have sex with our husbad and your kid wants to come in and demends an answer why she can't, which one is better, to say just cause we say so, or to explain that seeing what private things your parents are doing right now would be damaging to you...?

This would have the be the weirdest, silliest and grossest argument in favor of telling children white lies i have ever had the displeasure to read..What child would even do that?

I wouldnt cover up my daughter more than my son for reasons of sexual predators. Im with her after all. And clothing wont change the predator, anymore for children than for adults. Teach her(and him) about bodily autonomy, teach them that its their body, and they can say no. Teach them to tell a trusted adult of they sense something is off, tell them to scream bloody murder if someone tries to touch them inappropriately. But dont lie to them unnecessarily and then wonder why they wont trust you when you need them to most.

 

[jmarroq]

Sunblock is a must, especially on nipples. Ouch! I remember my French relatives had special cream they put on their nipples when they went topless!

In any case, I agree that in our society, there is probably a cut off for girls to go topless...overseas, not so much. I don't get why the US is that way, but they are.

I saw a family (I think they were Brazilian from what I could hear) with a topless girl at a pool in the Disney area and she was developing already. She was probably about 8 or 9. No one told her to cover up, and I think that is great, but I am sure some families were uncomfortable with it.

I have a 7 yr old daughter and an 11 yr old son. My son likes to sleep naked, and is comfortable walking around in his underwear sometimes (we live in a hot climate). I have to remind my daughter to put on a shirt sometimes at home. In public, she was covered full time by about 3 but she never protested or asked why. I guess it didn't occur to her.

If my daughter did protest it, I would just tell her it is the law in most places for women to cover up their breasts in public, and the same goes for girls over the age of (fill in whatever age you are comfortable with). You can tell her you think it is a silly law, but that you still have to obey the laws.

 

[contactmaya]

Quote:

Originally Posted by jmarroq

Sunblock is a must, especially on nipples. Ouch! I remember my French relatives had special cream they put on their nipples when they went topless!

In any case, I agree that in our society, there is probably a cut off for girls to go topless...overseas, not so much. I don't get why the US is that way, but they are.

I saw a family (I think they were Brazilian from what I could hear) with a topless girl at a pool in the Disney area and she was developing already. She was probably about 8 or 9. No one told her to cover up, and I think that is great, but I am sure some families were uncomfortable with it.

I have a 7 yr old daughter and an 11 yr old son. My son likes to sleep naked, and is comfortable walking around in his underwear sometimes (we live in a hot climate). I have to remind my daughter to put on a shirt sometimes at home. In public, she was covered full time by about 3 but she never protested or asked why. I guess it didn't occur to her.

If my daughter did protest it, I would just tell her it is the law in most places for women to cover up their breasts in public, and the same goes for girls over the age of (fill in whatever age you are comfortable with). You can tell her you think it is a silly law, but that you still have to obey the laws.

You might be surprised to know that it is not a legal requirement for a woman to cover her chest in New York State. I dont know about other states or countries. You may be surprised. The law in any case, would not necessarily apply to a child. I believe in getting my facts right when explaining these things to kids.

When it comes to underaged children running naked in sprinklers, it turns out there is no law at all. I researched it once when harassed by a playground employee when i let my 2yo son run naked. Admittedly, even when i put pants on him, he took them off.

Personally, i cover up nipples as well as most body parts when in the harsh sun, and wouldnt think twice about covering my children in the same way. In the late afternoon however, its a different matter. The sun is not harmful then.

 

[jmarroq]

Quote:

Originally Posted by contactmaya

You might be surprised to know that it is not a legal requirement for a woman to cover her chest in New York State. I dont know about other states or countries. You may be surprised. The law in any case, would not necessarily apply to a child. I believe in getting my facts right when explaining these things to kids.

When it comes to underaged children running naked in sprinklers, it turns out there is no law at all. I researched it once when harassed by a playground employee when i let my 2yo son run naked. Admittedly, even when i put pants on him, he took them off.

Personally, i cover up nipples as well as most body parts when in the harsh sun, and wouldnt think twice about covering my children in the same way. In the late afternoon however, its a different matter. The sun is not harmful then.

No, I'm not surprised to know that. I am from NY. That is why I said "in most places". But yes, I didn't think about the fact that laws don't apply to kids necessarily. Good point. You would have to clarify that for a kid so they don't think they are a law breaker!

 

[sarawills]

I never felt the need to make my daughter wear a top until she had breast buds. And even to this day if she is just around the house we dont make a big deal about it. If we are out in public she will often opt for just a pair of bikini bottoms with a rash guard shirt.

 

[erinn82]

I never felt the need to make my daughter wear a top until she had breast buds. And even to this day if she is just around the house we dont make a big deal about it. If we are out in public she will often opt for just a pair of bikini bottoms with a rash guard shirt.

We are kind of the same way with our 7 year old. In private she wears or doesn't wear whatever she wants but in public she covers up. She is just as happy to wear her one piece.

 

[beachmom5]

Don't see the issue, especially for little girls. I grew up in Eastern Europe and girls never wore tops until their teens and even then no one thought anything of a teen who didn't. I'm just not that uptight about it, I rarely wear bras and unless it's really necessary I don't bother with bikini tops either.

 

[Charlotte1978]

I don't understand why if they are girls they have to wear a t-shirt, mine have never worn them and neither have the other girls I know, in fact my daughters don't wear anything they are always naked at home and if possible even outside the house and even the girls who are their friends

 

[Lunetta25]

I don't understand why they force her to wear a t-shirt, I don't think it's right, my daughters who are 10 and 8 years old never wear one, in fact they are always naked as well as practically all of their friends both male and female